In this week’s episode, the Lodge’s do their very best to become the new Blossoms. Also, Riverdale mades sure to shatter every theory I had made from last week’s premier.

But I can’t hold it against you, Riverdale. I like a show that’s two steps ahead of me at all times.

In the wake of Fred Andrew’s shoot, Pop’s Chock’Lit Shoppe is struggling with business. And it’s no small surprise that Betty immediately begins a campaign to save it.

But neither Archie nor Jughead are interested in being her major supports. Archie now spends most of his time staying awake at night to watch the doors in the house. He knows that the man who shot his father is still at large, leaving Archie feeling vulnerable. He even approaches Reggie for some “jingle jangle” – a drug that will help him stay up at night.

Jughead, on the other hand, is trying to save FP from agreeing to the horrible deal that the lawyer managed to get. Juggie goes to the Serpents for help again, and is even naive enough to suggest a jailbreak. But he’s told that he can see a snake handler for help.

The snake handler in question is lawyer Penny Peabody, another Southside Serpent. The gang, she claims, paid her way through law school. When Jughead goes to see her, she tells him the obvious: the deal for FP is a shit one (20 years with the deal, at least 40 if his case goes to trial). And the only way she can see FP managing a better position is by the family of the victim to forgive FP in front of a judge.

And getting the Blossoms to do something nice for you is not an easy task. Betty and Jughead go to the Blossom women to ask for their help, but are immediately turned down. But Betty isn’t one to take things lightly. She hunts down Cheryl and threatens to make the video of Clifford Blossom fatally shooting Jason public.

Cheryl reluctantly agrees, and lies in front of a judge. Cheryl also agrees to allowing the River Vixens to help out at Betty’s Retro Night event at Pop’s.

Veronica spends much of the episode running away from her father. When she receives a call from Betty that Pop’s received an offer from an anonymous buyer, she confronts her parents about it, assuming that her father made the offer. She then shows her mother the threatening letter she received from her dad, forcing Veronica to testify for him.

But Hermione waves away the letter, and claims to have written it herself. And really, if she admits to doing that, what else is this woman capable of? Though, being as shrewd as she is, Veronica decides to simply not trust either of her parents.

Archie eventually learns of Miss Grundy’s death. He immediately connects the death of his former flame with the shooting of his father. He approaches Alice Cooper and asks her to visit the coroner to find out details.

Alice, being the nosy lady she is, agrees to see the body. The coroner tells her that Miss Grundy was killed with an object from the house, and since there was no sign of forced entry – she was most likely killed by someone she knew. The coroner also divulges that Miss Grundy had been killed in a crime of passion.

With that news, Archie goes to the sheriff. He says that he believes the killer could be Miss Grundy’s ex-husband, but Sheriff Keller says that her ex had already been brought in and had an “air-tight alibi”. So…so much for that theory.

During retro night at Pop’s, a flurry of activity happens (much to Alice Cooper’s glee). The Pussycats perform (plus Cheryl!), Archie finally is able to go back into Pop’s and Pop’s announces that his Chock’lit Shoppe has been saved.

Veronica, after a heart-to-heart with Jughead, finally forgives her parents and asks them for a fresh start. The Lodges agree to their daughter’s idea, and Hiram says he will make a large “charitable contribution” to help Pop’s.

But only when Veronica is out of earshot do the secrets pour out of Hiram. He tells Hermione that they’ve bought Pop’s (exactly what Veronica said she didn’t want). He also thanks Hermione for lying for him by claiming she wrote the threatening letter.

See, Veronica? That’s what you get for being a forgiving woman without actually having a reason to be forgiving.

As the episode closes, all hell begins to break loose (as seems to be typical of a Riverdale episode this season thus far). Cheryl gets the video back from Betty, and shows her mother the video of Jason’s death. FP calls Jughead, warning him to stay away from Peabody. Archie BUYS A GUN. And after all that theorising: both Midge and Moose are murdered.

So there are are with that. With a 22-episode season this year, I think Riverdale really needs to make this a big mystery. “Chapter Fifteen” certainly does that.

Why Midge and Moose? Was Archie just being selfish? Well, probably. Considering Midge only made her first on-screen appearance this episode, it’s hard to pin down exactly what she and her boyfriend could be guilty of, if anything at all. It’s certainly a chin scratcher. But I really can’t wait to see the kids lose it over this double homicide.

But one aside: with so many dads present in this episode, where the heck is Hal Cooper (and Polly for that matter)? At least we have time to fill the gaps. Is it next week already?