For the past few months, I’ve struggled with the motivation to write here. Not because there weren’t films that I enjoyed or wanted to write about, but the purpose of this blog has since ended. Writing for writing’s sake feel aimless. Though it did shock me a bit when I realised I hadn’t written anything on a specific film since June of last year.
Productivity? Who needs her?
What I have been doing is wandering around London loads, soaking in my last days in this city. I’ve been taking pictures (with an almighty iPhone 11) of the everyday things I see. It’s been the tower blocks and council estates that fascinate me the most: the giant, winding places that have personalities of their own.
As I walk by a night, I always get the feeling that the buildings are watching me.
My desire to write anything about films was gone. Until this week, that is, when I watched John Smith’s short film The Black Tower.
…and then watched it again a further three times in as many days.
I’ve become obsessed with this experimental film. It’s both haunting and peculiar, which is my favourite mix of things.
In the short, a man is being stalked (or perhaps haunted) by a looming black tower that seemingly follows him whever he goes. It first appears to him on a normal day in April, though he soon forgets about it.
When he sees it again, he’s more confused than concerned. He asks around, but no one else knows what he’s talking about. The tower seems into his mind and dreams, and his mind appears to be unravelling.
You only catch a glimpse of the narrator as he goes about his life in London. Instead, images are from his point of view, namely of the tower itself. There are close-ups over the tower, often leaving only minuscule bits of light visible on the screen – making the film feel claustrophobic at times. Smith is excellent at creating a sense of foreboding and unease.
Eventually, the narrator tries to escape the tower, but the tower is everywhere he is. He locks himself in his flat, surviving off choc ices from the ice cream van. Eventually, he’s taken to a hospital where he (again, seemingly) begins to recover from his (supposed) mental decline.
Most interpretations of the film that I’ve read take to the idea that this is all in the narrator’s head. It’s his paranoia that stays with him in his mind. To me, it is more interesting to take the view that it isn’t just in his head.
I am by no means great at deciphering art (there are some really interesting pieces on this, however). But the tower blocks, prison, church and factory locations all seem (to me) to symbolise the supposed suffocation of the city and the strain of living in it. However, the ‘freedom’ of the countryside doesn’t release the narrator from the tower’s grip.
Smith uses some really clever tricks in this film. Some of which I think we can see impressions of in films like Skinamarink, which explores the uncanny and liminal spaces.
Anyway, I might not be smart enough to understand it completely, but I’m wholly obsessed. The meaning will come to me when it needs to.
Christ. 2023. What a year! I sit here tip-tapping this, feeling so proud of myself and what I achieved in these last months. The films I saw along the way helped shape my year. It’s overwhelming how much good shit I saw. Making up my top five lists this year was actually really difficult – I left a lot of really great films off these lists. Each #1 spot, though, was easy and automatic.
Check out my Letterboxd to see everything I logged and ranked in the last year. My 2023 list is mostly updated, but it’s kind of in a state of disarray.
Happy new year. Here’s to a 2024 that will certainly be as good as we want to make it.
Favourite 2023 horror releases (per UK cinema or festival release date)
5. Scream Therapy by Cassie Keet
4. Hippo dir. by Mark H. Rapaport
3. Booger dir. by Mary Dauterman
2. Black Mold dir. by John Pata
1. Skinamarink dir. by Kyle Edward Ball
The thing about Skinamarink is that I wasn’t fully convinced by it the first time I watched it. And yet, I kept feeling myself pulled towards this film. I think about it all the time. And something that lives so constantly in my head should be deemed my favourite of the year. Will most people like it? Nah. Y’all hate it. It’s the only film I’ve ever been to that people have walked out of. But this is a beautiful, unusual, bizarre, absolutely one-of-a-kind film that I think will make a huge impact on the genre.
If not, it’s certainly made a huge one on me.
Favourite non-horror 2023 releases
5. Reality dir. by Tina Satter
4. Barbie dir. by Greta Gerwig
3. Rye Lane dir. by Raine Allen-Miller
2. Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. dir. by Kelly Fremon Craig
1. Past Lives dir. by Celine Song
Love live the ladies. A top five dominated by women who told stories that each touched me in wildly different ways. Celine Song’s Past Lives is a touching story of longing and melancholy that will stay with me for such a long time. My absolute favourite of the year – full stop.
Favourite new-to-me horror films (non-2023 releases)
5. The Boxer’s Omen (1983) dir. by Kuei Chih-Hung
4. Tales from the Hood (1995) dir. by Rusty Cundieff
3. Peeping Tom (1960) dir. by Michael Powell
2. The Fifth Cord (Giornata nera per l’ariete) (1971) dir. by Luigi Bazzoni
1. Anguish (Angustia) (1987) dir. by Bigas Luna
Bigas Luna’s Angustia is so difficult to explain without giving away any of its surprises – and there are so many. I was absolutely floored by this movie. Like the previous two favourites, I cannot stop thinking about this film. I’m constantly wondering when I’ll be able to see it again (it is difficult to find in the UK, but increasingly easy to see in other markets).
Seek it out. Watch it. Makes this the cult film it’s meant to be. Get midnight showings of it now. I don’t want to go into any details, but fuck. I love this movie.
Favourite new-to-me films (non-2023 releases)
5. All That Jazz (1979) dir. by Bob Fosse
4. Top of the Heap (1972) dir. by Christopher St. John
3. Chungking Express (1994) dir. by Wong Kar-wai
2. Enter the Dragon (1973) dir. by Robert Clouse
1. Police Story (1985) dir. by Jackie Chan
In 2023, I continued my exploration of Hong Kong martial arts films. I tackled some of the iconic ones and absolutely was not let down by the sheer beauty, humour and talent that are in both Police Story and Enter the Dragon. These are movies that I want to watch and rewatch again and show to everyone I know even though everyone has asked that I stop.
Following the in-person Soho Horror Film Festival was the at-home “Sohome” version this past weekend. Having done a virtual festival before, I wasn’t super confident I was going to enjoy this. But man, I really did. As someone who can’t afford to see that many films at festivals, this was an affordable (and flexible) way of seeing 14 feature films and nearly 30 (!!!) short films.
Shout out to Mitch who created a fun space to chat with people and watch the introductions. I really do love the work he’s done, and if you’re able to travel to London (or are based in the UK), I think both versions of the festival are worth checking out.
Horror really lends itself to the short film medium, and that was apparent with the wide variety of high-quality shorts this weekend. So many were excellent that my top 5 quickly became a top 10 for me. And while I have 10 listed here, there were so, so many more that I thought were outstanding.
Top shorts (in no particular order):
1. Charlie the Canceled Skeleton dir. by Joe Reilly
2. CONTENT: The Lo-Fi Man dir. by Blake Myers and Brian Lonano
3. The 44th Chamber of Shaolin dir. by Jon Truei
4. Marked dir. by Catherine Bonny
5. Perfect City: The Bravest Kid dir. by Shengwei Zhou
6. Not Him dir. by Sarah Young
7. Ten of Swords dir. by Faye Jackson
8. Secret Santa dir. by Lynn Kristmanson
9. Get Away dir. by Michael Gabriele
10. Night of the Bride dir. by Virat Pal
Top feature-length films:
1. Scream Therapy dir. by Cassie Keet
2. The Last Movie Ever Made dir. by Nathan Blackwell
3. Hell Hath No Fury dir. by Zachary Burns
If there’s one theme to my top favourite movies of the year (coming soon), most of them were directed and written by women. Keet’s Scream Therapy excels because of the core group of girlfriends at its centre. They’re so likeable and believable as friends. This one has so many twists, it’s worth going in with no expectations. But a group of friends go to the desert for some scream therapy, only to get dragged into a demonic ritual. Leave your expectations at the door.
The Last Movie Ever Made also has a great group of characters at its heart. When everyone on Earth learns they are living in a simulation that’s about to end, Marshall decides to finish making a film he and his friends hadn’t finished in high school. It’s a surprisingly poignant film that had me literally sobbing throughout the last ten minutes or so.
Seemingly I have a soft spot for comedies, as Hell Hath No Fury is a comedy that rounds out my top three of the festival. It’s part slapstick, part domestic thriller and I loved it all. There are some really stupid jokes in here that got a good guffaw out of me.
As a treat, Hippowas shown again. This was one of my favourite films of the regular Soho Horror Film Festival, but it is also one of my favourite movies of the year full stop. Highly, highly recommend finding this one when it (hopefully, inevitably) gets a wider release.
I’m not likely to watch any more new horror film releases this year, but I feel like these last few weeks topped up my favourites. As my mom would tell me: I’m spoiled. (And I know it and love it.)
In the words of the Scots I met this weekend: “Horror fans need to stick together.” “Weird horror fans need to stick together.”
This weekend while attending Soho Horror Film Festival, I felt like I found a new home. A festival that champions safe spaces for LGTBQ+ people, women and other marginalised groups sounds really good on paper, but it was just overwhelming to feel in person.
I’ve been attending FrightFest for quite a few years now, but this was the first time I felt a connection with the people attending. It was beyond lovely to meet so many people. A big, big shout out to my seat pal Michael. Cheers to being 32 and hitting that “midlife crisis”. You were very kind to this awkward American. If you’re in Scotland in the spring, check out Dundead.
After this weekend, I feel genuinely inspired by the films I saw and the people I met. This is the first time in months I’ve felt any desire to write. Sure, it might (mostly) be the therapy working that’s reminding me to have these things called “goals” and “aspirations”, but good vibes as a horror festival probably helped.
The films themselves were incredible. Mitch Harrod did a wonderful job of programming. I only got a chance to catch six films (plus ten shorts), but not one of them was a dud. Two, in fact, cracked my top ten of the year.
Top three films of the fest:
Booger dir. by Mary Dauterman
Hippo dir. by Mark H. Rapaport
Frogman dir. by Anthony Cousins
The first (and favourite) film that I saw at the festival was Dauterman’s Booger. One part The Curse of the Cat People with a story about grief and what it can do to you if you deny it. As someone who has lost friends, this is a film that deeply resonated with me. Anna was a character who was easy to relate to, and I just adored this. Also, big bonus getting to see both Marcia DeBonis and Heather Matarazzo pop up.
Following Booger was fan-favourite Hippo. This black-and-white film is a stunning look at toxic masculinity in the pre-Columbine era. Trying to explain the plot isn’t entirely worth it – just know that it manages to be both horrifying and funny (my favourite combo). I think when this gets a wider release, people are going to go nuts for it.
Very different to the other two is Frogman, a silly folk-horror found-footage film. If you know anything about the Loveland Frogman, you can probably imagine the insanity that unfolds. I enjoyed that the story kept pushing the silly further and further. You probably shouldn’t take yourself too seriously when the Frogman wants to fuck.
Honourable mention to the film that closed the festival, Only the Good Survive. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about the movie, but it was so inventive and fun (and full of gorgeous actors!) that I’m still thinking about it.
Favourite shorts:
The Watcher dir. by Nathan Sellers
We Joined a Cult dir. by Chris McInroy
Toad Boy dir. by Phil McLaughlin
I have a thing for cults, apparently, as both my first and second picks involve them. And yet The Watcher and We Joined a Cult couldn’t be more different. Toad Boy was a twisted little number involving some very satisfying revenge.
So sure I’m moving back to the States, but something tells me that I’m going to be dumb enough to have my first trip back to London fall during the 2024 iteration…
Keywords to help jog my memories: mulled wine, frogs, egg punk, karaoke trauma, self-affirmation alarms.
For over ten years now, I’ve been tippy-tapping away at this blog. There has never been a large gap where I wasn’t writing some sort of nonsense here. I guess it’s for that reason I feel the need to give one of those dread “life updates”.
Unfortunately, my time as an American of London is coming to an end.
I emigrated at the ripe age of 22, full of vigour and ambition. Unfortunately, I was hit by a good one-two punch of depression and anxiety that I allowed to derail my life. That girl became a hollow shell of herself.
The hard part: my husband left me shortly after lockdown. The hardest part was learning how to pick myself back up. How do you manage anything when you allow yourself to slip so far for so many years? Turns out some serious CBT followed by sessions with a hard-ass Glaswegian therapist really helps.
That all came later. In the immediate aftermath, I found myself alone and (seemingly) without a purpose for the first time in nearly 10 years. When I first studied abroad in London in 2012, I knew this city was all that I wanted. The city I had, but thanks to my self-destructive tendencies, I was left with barely any friends to do anything with. My anxiety had basically stopped me from being able to do any sort of day-to-day activity without feeling like everything would go wrong. I had to do something, though.
What that “something” was, I had no idea. My first weekend alone, I decided to dish out my money to go to FrightFest. I crept into the cinema by myself, certain everyone could tell I was a fraud and a loser, but it was fine. Because of course it was.
A couple weeks later, I went to see Malignant. This was the first time I tried carrying a soda and popcorn by myself while trying to get the door. I grabbed the cup wrong, and soda went everywhere – mostly inside my boot. No one noticed, (but of course they didn’t) and I got to experience how wonderful it is to just enjoy something on your own.
The rest of the year, I began going to the cinema nearly every single week. Very soon the horror releases weren’t enough. I began booking anything and everything: Akira, Hausu, 12 Angry Men, Comeback to the Five and Dime. My tastes began to develop and grow. As cliche as it all is, new worlds began opening up to me.
Cinemas became my safe havens. But I noticed I wasn’t the only one who was alone. It was just me and two single gentlemen at Dumb Money. It was me and the crying woman in the next seat at Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. She and I sat there afterwards and exchanged memories about our grandmothers. I hope she’s doing well. At Wong Kar-wai screenings, there were plenty of women my age, all by themselves because what are women but hopeless romantics?
And from there, I began to gain confidence and a desire to live again. I began roller skating, discovered my city, and made some unbelievably dear friends.
So thank Christ for movies because I’m not sure what I would have done without them. Sometimes I worry about what people think, as any single woman in her 30s is only there to be judged. The amount of pity I’ve received any time I say I’m going alone is exhausting. Thanks to that aforementioned therapy, though, I really don’t give a flying fuck anymore.
Every day I work towards my “recovery”. I don’t always get it right, and not every day is easy. But I can now carry forty things in one hand and get the door for you.
In a few months, I’ll just be an American in, well, America. Knowing that I’m losing that part of my life is hard. But I’m still Krista. I will always be that girl who enjoys crying, songs with good bass lines, my best friend’s company, wearing short skirts, and – yes – movies.
I pulled my shit together and came out of it a better person than I ever was before. Whatever’s next for me, I’m ready. Thank you, blog, for being here through all of it.
We did it, Joe. Or I did it, I guess. 13 weeks, 101 new-to-me horror movies and a vow to never-ever do this again.
I’m pleased that I was able to keep up for the most part. Did I stumble at the final hurdle? Yes. But a mental breakdown must be allowed at least once in the lead-up to Halloween.
And speaking of breakdowns, this is me signing off for a few weeks for a mental health break. Times are tough, and I do not care to send any more words into the abyss.
So if you don’t mind me, I’ll be watching nothing but kung fu or trashy rom-coms (or absolutely fuck all) for the next month. Byeee.
#98-101
98 Onibaba (1964) dir. by Kaneto Shindō
A stunning piece of 60s Japanese cinema. Two women in medieval Japan must survive on their own when food is scarce and the man of their household is away at war. Together, they kill samurai in order to sell their armour. But it’s when a soldier returns home that a wedge is driven between the women.
I’ve watched a lot of beautiful movies over the past three months, and this one has to be in the top three. The way the tall grass acts almost like an additional character… just absolute, pure cinema.
99 Peeping Tom (1960) dir. by Michael Powell
If you ever have the chance to see Peeping Tom for the first time, watch it with a friend who has an uncommon amount of random knowledge of old British comedies and films. Is it necessary context? No. Will he still talk to you about it for an hour after like you understand any of it? Yes. And that’s what friends are for!
I absolutely adored this movie. A pure and utter classic for a reason. Much funnier than I expected with cinematography straight out of a 60s Bava film. It truly needs nothing more to be said about it. Near perfection.
100 House of Wax (1953) dir. by André de Toth
Monday night my friend and I enjoyed a House of Wax double feature. This Vincent Prince version was shown before the Paris Hilton one. And yes it’s Paris Hilton’s version – do NOT correct me.
I’m not a huge fan of the 1933 original, Mystery of the Wax Museum. So it wasn’t terribly surprising that the remake wasn’t my favourite either. There’s certainly a lot to like: Vincent Price being the main thing.
However, I LOVE watching 3D movies in 2D. They are SO WEIRD. The paddle ball guy had the audience just dying.
Also: if there is one thing that both the 1953 and the 2005 versions have in common? LOADS of punching.
101 Hell House LLC Origins: The Carmichael Manor (2023) dir. by Stephen Cognetti
Okay. This might be the scariest 2023 horror movie I’ve seen this year (so far, anyway). And honestly, I was a bit shocked at how much I enjoyed this prequel-of-sorts to the iconic Hell House LLC, which remains one of the strongest found-footage movies ever made.
It was a smart move to shift away from the Abadon Hotel, as the previous two sequels were not terribly successful for me. It very much felt like they were treading familiar ground with the same scares. And arguably, that’s the case here too, but it feels fresher in a new location.
The cast is also the best group of characters since the original. Both contain very likeable and very hateable people.
I’m not sure if I completely understood all of the lore, but if you have creepy cults and those FUCKING clowns – I’m sold. Had me screaming like the terrified little child I am.
Ahem, just a quick note to future Krista when she’s looking back on this in a few months time:
DO NOT DO THIS STUPID PROJECT AGAIN. YOU HATE IT EVERY YEAR. STOP CONVINCING YOURSELF THAT THIS IS FUN.
Anyway…tried watching more 2023 releases this week. Can’t say it was worth the push. And at this point, I wonder if any other horror films will make my list of favourites of the year (so far, it’s a very, very short list).
#90-97
90Dark Harvest (2023) dir. by David Slade
A week on, and I’ve already forgotten most of this film. The concept is slightly unclear, which probably doesn’t help matters. Boys must hunt down Sawtooth Jack before midnight on Halloween. Why? Something about consequences for the town, but it’s difficult to worry about the place when everyone in it is absolute trash. The story leaves a lot to be desired, as do the performances from the leads (which I will chalk up to just poor writing). Ultimately, the best thing about this movie was the “Neat Neat Neat” needle drop.
The film is adapted from a book by Norman Partridge. And from what I’ve read from other reviewers, the book is significantly more fleshed out and better (which these things often are). Perhaps in a few years, once I’ve completely forgotten this movie’s existence, I’ll have to give that a try instead.
91 V/H/S/85 (2023) dir. by David Bruckner, Scott Derrickson, Gigi Saul Guerrero, Natasha Kermani and Mike P Nelson
V/H/S is a series of films that almost works for me about 50% of the time. This one I also found adequately okay. You can tell that Scott Derrickson stands head-and-shoulders above the rest. His segment “Dream Kill” was far and away the best, and I think it would make for a great feature-length film.
At this point, I only keep watching them so that Letterboxd will tell me I completed the series.
92 Rabbits (2002) dir. by David Lynch
It’s been a very long time since I’ve watched anything by Lynch. Watching Rabbits was like getting my brain unravelled and rewired – and I absolutely mean that in a positive way.
Rabbits is a series of short films done in a sitcom style. Though, because it’s Lynch, everything about it is both familiar and eerily “not right”. A family of rabbits move in and out of their living room, delivering seemingly unrelated dialogue.
Things occasionally happen like a demon’s face appearing in a corner or a rabbit bringing in lit candles. Do I have any idea what it means? Absolutely not. Did I still love it? Of course.
93 Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust (2000) dir. by Yoshiaki Kawajiri
Vampuire Hunter D (1985) was one of the first films I watched at the beginning of this year’s 100 Horror Movies project. I wasn’t a massive fan, honestly, so I wasn’t sure what to expect with the sequel.
The 2000 follow-up is superior in almost every way. The story, the characters, the art – all better. I’d easily recommend this to anyone who wanted to try a horror anime.
94 The Puppetman (2023) dir. by Brandon Christensen
I’m not going to sit and drag this movie. Everyone else has already done it. Not for me, unfortunately.
95 Willy’s Wonderland (2021) dir. by Kevin Lewis
When an unnamed man (Nicolas Cage) needs to get his car fixed, he agrees to work overnight at a family restaurant to work off his debt. While there, the restaurant’s possessed animatronic characters attack him.
With a premise like that, I really was hoping to be in for some campy fun. And fun is not what I got. They’re lucky they got Cage to be in this, as he’s fantastic and saves it. The rest of it fell flat for me.
As it’s a blatant rip-off of Five Nights at Freddy’s, I’m hoping for something scarier or funnier… or both, actually. Both would be nice.
96 No One Will Save You (2023) dir. by Brian Duffield
I hate aliens. Sci-fi and I do not mix. However, out of all the 2023 releases I watched this week, this was easily my favourite. And that reason is Kaitlyn Dever.
Dever is an underrated icon. I absolutely adore her in everything I’ve seen her in. She’s got the range: she delivered the heartbreak in Unbelievable and was crazily charming in Rosalind (which, by the way, it’s a goddamn shame that we literally cannot watch that film anymore. I will never not be bitter about this.)
A woman lives on her own outside of the town she’s been ostracised from. When an alien attacks her at home, she soon realises that everyone else is at risk too.
It’s a bit long for what it is. I think it would be great as an hour-long special in an anthology TV series versus a feature-length movie. There is almost no dialogue, which makes it unique but also a bit slow at times. However, I absolutely adored the ending when it finally arrived; it simultaneously made me laugh and feel a sense of pity.
97 Tales from the Hood (1995) dir. by Rusty Cundieff
Beautiful people: this is the film that saved the week. It might have been the oldest that I watched in the past seven days, but it hasn’t aged a bit and is still the most relevant.
Usually when I talk about anthologies, I give the usual “most anthologies have good and bad segments” but this is absolutely the exception to the rule. Every short story here is memorable and powerful in its own way.
The wrap-around story involves three men who arrive at a funeral parlour to pick up drugs. There they meet a mortician who tells them the stories of four dead bodies. The stories cover themes of abuse, police corruption and unity in the Black community. It’s dark, funny and powerful.
For those based in London, the PCC is showing it on the 26th. Get your bloody tickets now!
I will say, my greatest accomplishment was getting my work’s VPN to link to the US so I could watch Tubi. That meant finally being able to watch Tales from the Hood after looking for it for so long.
This week was rather testing, both mentally and (mostly) physically. I had little-to-no energy left to spend watching films. So what I have this week is essentially the crap that I thought could hold my attention for at least 45 minutes. It wasn’t until Tuesday that I finally felt myself and could turn something on that I enjoyed rather than tolerated.
RIP to all the films we lost along the way… There were many. Most of you didn’t get a chance beyond the five-minute mark, but your service will be remembered.
#81-89
81 The Worst Witch (1986) dir. by Robert Young
A dated children’s TV movie based on a dated British children’s book series. There’s not much interesting about this, but Fairuza Balk was such a magnetic child actress. If anything, just skip to the part where Tim Curry sings. That’s the real reason we’re all here.
82 Totally Killer (2023) dir. by Nahnatchka Khan
This slasher capitalises on the current trend of silly-but-clever girl caught in a weird time warp. It’s part Happy Death Day2 U with (only some of) the heart of The Final Girls. It’s perfectly fine and appropriately funny in parts, but I don’t think it stands up to similar films in the genre.
83 Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood
Incidentally, I completely forgot that there was a Friday the 13th this month. I watched this on Thursday the 12th. So go me, I guess.
At this point, I cannot tell any of these films apart. I have to keep reading the synopses to remind myself what happened previously. They’ve all sort of clumped together in my mind. I just don’t think I’m a franchise girly. Give it up already!
84 The Exorcist: Believer (2023) dir. by David Gordon Green
Let me preface this by saying that I actually really liked Green’s Halloween trilogy. Particularly the first and third. Yeah. I enjoyed Halloween Ends a lot. Kill me. So depending on how you feel about that opinion, you can disregard or care about my thoughts accordingly.
I didn’t hate it. The first act in particular is very solid. It was building up to an interesting story. However, things begin to fall apart when poor Chris MacNeil gets involved. The exorcism scene itself is just silly, and it all lacks a real sense of originality.
The performances from Leslie Odom Jr, Lidya Jewett and Olivia O’Neill are all very good. Odom in particular was great, carrying almost the entire film on his performance.
85 Murders in the Rue Morgue (1932) dir. by Robert Florey
I love a Poe adaption, but they really don’t like to be faithful to the source material, do they? This version of Rue Morgue is about a carnival performer/mad scientist (who, honestly, is living the dream) who attacks women in order to mix their blood with an ape’s.
Bela Lugosi is here just chewing the scenery. He’s absolutely magnetic (and honestly, a bit hot with that curly, floppy hair). The rest is just okay, but is bolstered by the beautiful set design.
86 The Mighty Peking Man (1977) dir. by Ho Meng-Hua
It’s been a few weeks since I watched a Hong Kong horror film. This King Kong-meets-Tarazan story didn’t exactly scratch the itch.
A group of men from Hong Kong go to the jungle to capture a giant ape. Thankfully it’s a pretty easy task once they meet a woman who has a ‘special bond’ (if you know what I mean) with the animals. They bring the ape to the city and, well, you can probably guess the rest.
Honestly, my brain shut off during this one. I had somehow turned off the subtitles at some point and was just watching it in Cantonese. Once I rubbed the drool from my chin, I began to kind of enjoy this silly movie. The lead actress at one point spins around with a jaguar on her shoulders. I fear for the animals on that set, but it was dumb enough to laugh at.
87The Vampire and the Ballerina (L’amante del vampire) (1960) dir. by Renato Polselli
When a group of ballerinas go to a small village for a performance, they soon hear rumours of a vampire in the area. And for two of them, they soon learn that the rumours are true.
This 60s vampire movie is pretty sexy for its time. Apparently that was rather influential on genre films that would come later in the decade. The girls here can actually dance, unlike in Suspiria. But Suspiria’s bad dancers are one of the things I love most about that damn movie.
My favourite thing about this film? The vampires. They look goofy as hell. I love him!
88 Horror in the High Desert 2: Minerva (2023) dir. by Dutch Marich
The first Horror in the High Desert is a solid found-footage movie that purposefully kept the scares to a minimum until the last act.
Seemingly having learned a lesson (though I’m not sure that’s the right term, as the first one worked just as well), the director sprinkles the uneasy feeling throughout the sequel. In this one, student Minnie goes missing during a semester program in Nevada.
Because she’s far away from home, she sends regular video messages to her best friend. Soon after Minnie arrives, though, she begins to experience physical symptoms and, through her videos, we (sort of) see the horrors that lead up to her death.
There are really terrific, horrifying scenes in this that allows your imagination to take you to places. Nothing is really ever shown on screen, but I love horror that lets your mind fill in the blanks. I personally think this is right up there with the first entry.
89 Terrifier (2016) dir. by Damien Leone
I’m not going to give my thoughts on this one, as I knew going into it that it wasn’t going to be for me. But having only seen the sequel was starting to get on my nerves.
Last year, I saw Terrifier 2 with my pal at the cinema. We had a great time and both agreed it felt like an event. We were part of something. Did I like the movie itself? It was okay. Without that feeling of excitement, Terrifier just felt…fine to me. Extreme gore and a bit of misogyny. But also, the “reveal” had already been revealed to me by watching the sequel first. So I’m the only one to blame here!
(It also didn’t help that I was forced to watch a chunk of it on my phone when my internet went out. Please don’t be disappointed in me, David Lynch!!)
This week of the challenge, I decided to have a Treat Week of Italian horror. The Italians have made some of my favourite horror films. The giallo subgenre in particular combines my love for mystery and violence, on-screen deaths.
Though I think I’ve watched too many gialli in a short span. For now I’m certain that my (nonexistent) lover is planning to frame me for the murder of the woman who was blackmailing my ex-husband over the photos he took of the prime minister having an affair with my (nonexistent) lover’s mother!
Hm. I think it might be time for a mental health check-up.
I’ve been listening to Bruno Nicolai soundtracks and Rino Gaetano on repeat. I’m finding myself trying to fit “prego” into conversations like that obnoxious kid who just finished a semester abroad. I’ve stopped wearing bras. (This one, unfortunately, has little to no consequence.) The winged eyeliner has become more extreme! The desire to wear a big hat has hit me! The coffee consumption remains constant and excessive. I even (in a dark moment) had my first craving for a cigarette in over a decade.
Anyway, this might have been a week from hell personally, but at least the movies were fun.
#72-80
72 Caltiki, the Immortal Monster (Caltiki – Il mostro immortale) (1959) dir. by Riccardo Freda
The oldest film I watched this week was by a director whom I’ve never seen before, but by the end of it, had watched three.
This is clearly in the BA (Before Argento) era. It’s significantly more classic in the story it’s telling: archaeologists in Mexico mess with things they shouldn’t and unleash a killer mucus blob on the world.
The characters themselves are difficult to root for. There are some fun practical effects here, though, and it’s unlike any other Italian movie I’ve seen as far as the story it’s telling.
73 The Forbidden Photos of a Lady Above Suspicion (Le foto proibite di una signora per bene) (1970) dir. by Luciano Ercoli
This giallo is light on the murder and heavy on the mystery. A woman is being blackmailed when her husband begins to struggle financially at his job. She is forced into situations that test her physically and mentally.
The two lead actresses, Dagmar Lassander and Nieves Navarro, make this movie. They parade around in great hats and talk shit about men. I love them. Just as much as I loved this movie.
74 The Iguana with the Tongue of Fire (L’iguana dalla lingua di fuoco) (1971) dir. by Riccardo Freda
Dario Argento’s Bird with the Crystal Plumage (L’uccello dalle piume di cristallo) was released in 1970, and what followed was a whole slew of imitators with animal-themed names.
This one starts off brutally: a woman gets acid in her face, followed by her throat getting slit. Her body is found in the boot of an ambassador’s car, and suddenly everyone in the household is a suspect. From there on out, it’s a very standard, by-the-numbers mystery that fails to do anything memorable.
Director Freda worked on Caltiki, but this one he was less fond of. He used the pseudonym “Willy Pareto” instead, which is honestly a much better name. Lassander also makes an appearance here, but she’s used to much less effect, which is an absolute shame. Perfectly pleasant giallo, but easily the most forgettable of the week.
However, the one thing it DOES have going for it is the wonderfully over-dramatic moments when a pair of sunglasses (one of the glues) appears on screen. The music gets really loud, and I love it. Someone back a compilation of it, please.
75 The Fifth Cord (Giornata nera per l’ariete) (1971) dir. by Luigi Bazzoni
“But Krista, you said there was a trend for animal-named gialli post Crystal Plumage.” And I’m not wrong. The Italian name for this translates literally to Black Day for the Ram, but the English title goes with the original title from the novel from which it was adapted. So. Fuck you for ruining a good thing, English-language translators!
I’ve apparently owned the Blu-Ray since 2019. Oops. Though now that I’ve watched it, I feel deep regret. This is easily now in my top five gialli of all time. Italian hottie Franco Nero plays a drunk journalist who is trying to solve the mystery of a series of murders. Each of the murders is linked by one thing: a black glove left at the scene.
The mystery kept me guessing throughout, and I think is easily the strongest of the week. The cinematography (done by the legendary Vittorio Storaro) also helps set this apart from what was a rather bloated time in the giallo boom.
76 Contamination (1980) dir. by Luigi Cozzi
From one of my favourite directors of crazy shit (Starcrash and Paganini Horror are religious texts in this house), this Alien/Invasion of the Body Snatchers rip-off is fairly mild by Cozzi’s standards. It uses a lot of sci-fi horror cliches and doesn’t really take them anywhere new. That being said, there’s still plenty of fun to be had here.
77 A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin (Una lucertola con la pelle di donna) (1971) dir. by Lucio Fulci
I recall once that the PCC said that gialli are notoriously difficult to track down. So seeing Fulci’s giallo on the big screen felt like a treat. Fulci was great at making dramatic, stylish films, and Lizard Skin is no exception.
A woman is obsessed with her neighbour, who lives a much more freewheeling life. Following her neighbour’s murder, the woman realises she knows the exact details of the murder. Did she really do it or were these planted in her mind by someone else?
There are some really, really tense scenes. One in particular I think must have inspired that wire room scene in Suspiria. It’s very well done. One of the scenes almost landed Fulci in jail, so do keep that in mind if you’re sensitive to animal cruelty!
78 Ballad in Blood (2016) dir. by Ruggero Deodato
If this didn’t have Deodato’s name and reputation attached to it, I don’t think (certain) people would give it as much credit.
This is a gross and dirty film loosely based on the Amanda Knox case. Considering how much misogyny Knox faced during her trial, it’s not surprising that this movie is just as disgusting. My biggest issue with the film is that it’s so obviously trying to be edgy. Unfortunately, it just comes across as desperate and lame.
79 Murder Obsession (Follia omicida) (1981) dir. by Riccardo Freda
When an actor returns to his childhood home for the first time in years, he’s forced to confront his past. He’s been living with the guilt of killing his father as a child. When his colleagues join him, murderous instincts seemingly come back to him.
What starts off as a standard mystery, turns into a wildly gothic acid trip. It has more lightning and thunder than a TV movie. It’s a very slow start, but well worth sticking with for a wild third act.
80 Cemetery Man (DellaMorte DellAmore) (1994) dir. by Michele Soavi
Francesco Dellamorte works as a watchman at a cemetery. Along with his regular duties, he has to take care of “returners”, the dead who come back to life on the seventh night after their burial. It’s a very strange movie and unlike anything I watched this week.
Soavi really brings dark humour to this and Rupert Everett is just fantastic in this. There is an almost episodic approach to this, as there isn’t really a larger, overarching story. There’s just a series of bizarre tales loosely linked by Dellamorte’s adventures with pal and coworker Gna. I think it’s stylistically and thematically different to Soavi’s other films, but I adored it.
62 Snoop Dogg’s Hood of Horror (2006) dir. by Stacy Title
Hood of Horror is an anthology of three stories set in the hood, narrated by Snoop Dogg, who plays a man who gave up his soul to save his sister. It’s pretty bad, but also weirdly charming? Sure the acting is questionable, and the film is ugly in a way that only 2000s movies could manage. Yet many of the death scenes made me cackle with delight, and you can tell people cared about what they were making.
63-64 Ju-on: Black Ghost (2009) dir. by Mari Asato, Ju-on: White Ghost (2009) dir. by Ryuta Miyake
Having watched a J-horror documentary at FrightFest this year, I realised that I had a huge gap in my knowledge of the subgenre, and I was in dire need of catching up. Previously, I’d only seen Ju-on: The Grudge, which I liked enough. Both of these films were made to mark the 10th anniversary of the series.
Black Ghost is directed by Mari Asato. She caught my attention in The J-Horror Virus as the only woman director who was interviewed. This was nice enough but didn’t have any stand-out moments of terror or ambience. Reviews from fans of Ju-on said this is the worst in the series. But when you have nothing to compare it to, I thought it was fine.
White Ghost was a bit more frightening. There’s a moving head in a bag, which gave me flashbacks of “The Other Side of the Box“.
Both films, like The Grudge, are told through anachronistic vignettes. The format began to wear on me a bit, honestly. If they’re all like this, I’m not sure Ju-on movies are for me.
65 Sabrina the Teenage Witch (1996) dir. by Ryuta Miyake
This film was essentially a backdoor pilot for what was to become in iconic 90s television series. It’s really not great. It suffers from poor decisions that were thankfully fixed in the show, which premiered only months later. The humour isn’t there, the casting is all wrong (bar MJH, who gets a much better script in the series), the lore is off, and the characterisation isn’t true to the comics… Oh and Nick Bakay isn’t Salem, which is the WORST part.
66 Deadline (2009) dir. by Sean McConville
Oh Brittany Murphy. You were a treasure who had a much harder life than you deserved. Her presence on screen is always magnetic, but unfortunately that wasn’t enough to rescue this utterly miserable film.
Alice (Murphy) goes to a remote home to finish her script. She needs to get away to focus and to avoid her ex-boyfriend, who is to be released from prison after attacking her. At the home, she finds some video footage of the couple who lived in the house previously. As her stay goes on, Alice begins to become paranoid of what could have happened in the house and what is going on around her in the present.
It’s a mess of a script. It was a bad time.
67 Tower of London (1962) dir. by Roger Corman
I’m so glad I live in a world where Corman thought, “What if I make a historical film but make it wildly inaccurate but also an English version of Macbeth?”
68 Slugs (Slugs: muerte viscosa) (1988) dir. by Juan Piquer Simón
A gnarly (and yes I’m saying that unironically), weird little movie full of wooden acting and absolutely disgusting death scenes involving (surprise) slugs.
69Tormented (1960) dir. by Bert I. Gordon
First of all, I only chose to watch this because it was short and I was desperate to rewatch Mannequin instead. If I had known this was from the same director from King Dinosaur. If I had known that, I probably would have given this a miss.
However, it’s miles better than Dinosaur, even if it sounds like it was filmed in a tin can. A man allows his old girlfriend to fall to her death when he’s ending things with her. The movie proceeds to try and feel sorry for this guy as he is daunted by her vengeful ghost. It’s a shame he’s such a dick in the opening scene because he’s not easy to root for…
70Faust (Faust – Eine deutsche Volkssage) (1926) dir. by F. W. Murnau
Nosferatu is one of the most iconic films of the genre, and that’s understating things. I had never watched another one of director Murnau’s films, but I regret not putting this on sooner.
This silent film adaptation of the classical legend is stunning and heartbreaking. It reminded me of Hieronymus Bosch’s The Garden of Earthly Delights. Truly one of the best films I’ve watched this entire project.
71 The House That Dripped Blood (1971) dir. by Peter Duffell
This British anthology comes from Amicus Productions, a company that has very recently come back from the grave. Four tales and the framework tell stories of a rental home and its unfortunate residents.
It’s uneven, as almost all anthologies are, but the last two tales really bring it home. The story with the weird child and Christopher Lee is my favourite. The twist is madness and I love it. A goofy little movie that, by the end of it, found myself really enjoying.
I’ll definitely be checking out more Amicus films, as I can already tell they’re more my vibe than Hammer.
American of London 